Friday, October 2, 2009

On testing

On Monday I took a test in my programming test. I did not do so well on the test (read: didn't pass). Now, when I first got the numerical grade from Blackboard, I called my dad crying and told him I failed at life. He wasn't having any of that and just simply asked "Where are you going to go from here?" I sniffled and told him I didn't know, that I didn't have the test back, etc. I've been dreading this all week.

I got the test back today. We went over it in class and I realized that my problem is attention to detail. Once the professor started going over it, I realized what I had done wrong: for one or two, I just didn't understand the question; for most of the ones I got wrong, I didn't read the code carefully enough, which is where I made my errors. While it doesn't make the grade any more fun, it makes it bearable because I know where I made my mistakes.

So, I now have an answer to my dad's question: I know where I'm going from here. I have made appointments at the Learning Center (which takes HUGE pride swallowing since I work there) with a friend of mine who's a computer science tutor. I am going to start working the problems/answering the questions at the end of every section to make sure I get the concepts. I am going to pay more attention to detail on the next test. And I am going to stop thinking about this one. The perfectionist side of me hates that, but I really can't do anything else and stay sane. I messed up. There, I said it. Now I can move on.

And I'm really grateful for a father who has taught me that when I make mistakes or when sucky things happen, I need to take a breath, deal with that fact, then figure out how to fix it and not spend time wringing my hands over the fact that IT'S NOT ALL THE WAY IT SHOULD BE, which is what blinks in huge neon letters in my mind when I feel like I've failed. Dealing with it and moving on means that I haven't really failed, just learned from the mistake I've made. Which is a good life lesson.

Happy Friday!

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